Whoever is slow to anger is better than the mighty
and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city (Proverbs 16:32)
I want to invite you to think with me about Proverbs 16:32. It teaches the principle that self-control is better than power.
Specifically, let’s think about why this is so, how we can cultivate self-control and what the benefits are.
Crossett’s diagram showing the pendulum of vengence vs. overcoming evil with good
Let me begin with a story. I was due to graduate from college in 1970, but the graduation ceremony was never held. Something happened that caused classes to be cancelled: the Kent State Shootings. National Guard troops fired on and killed 4 students who were protesting the Viet Nam War in May of that year.
Instead of attending regular classes, students were supposed to discuss the issues of war and peace instead.
For my classics class, I had a brilliant professor named John Crossett. He held a PhD from Harvard, and was famous for never lecturing. Instead, he sat at the front of the class and used the Socratic method of asking questions, often demolishing the foolish beliefs of the students.
Crossett also happened to be a Christian, and I’ll never forget the simple diagram he made on the blackboard, illustrating the Christian solution to the problem of war. I couldn’t fully appreciate it at the time because I was not yet a Christian.
WHY THIS IS SO
First let’s look at the text. It is typical Hebrew poetry; it uses parallelism to repeat the same truth in a slightly different form.
The one who is slow to anger is better than the mighty. And the one who rules his own spirit is better than the one who takes a city.
Being slow to anger is equated with self-control and being mighty with being able to take a city.
The verse draws a sharp contrast between the one who is self-possessed and who can manage his own heart and the one who can use military power to conquer and dominate others. The principle is clear: self-control is better than the ability to take control of others.
Let’s think about why that is true. Self-control is a fruit of the Spirit; it comes from God. It is a desirable moral quality. It’s a virtue, it’s godly. The Bible says God himself is “slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love.” It is not a quality the ungodly possess.
Why is having the one who possesses self-control better than the one who “takes a city”? One who “takes a city” means one who conquers militarily. We could also take this to mean one who dominates politically. As military theorist Clausewitz famously said, “war is the continuation of politics by other means.”
For one thing, many of those who instigate wars do so precisely because they lack self-control. Let’s face it, how many wars are ever initiated according to Christian just war standards, which require wars to be necessary, defensive, proportionate and protective of innocent civilians?
HOW WE CULTIVATE SELF-CONTROL
As I mentioned, self-control is a fruit of the Spirit, as listed in Galatians 5:22-23.
It’s given so we can maintain our hearts for the Lord. Puritan pastor John Flavel wrote a book about this called Keeping the Heart, which is an exposition of Proverbs 4:23:
“Keep your heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.”
Flavel calls this business of keeping the heart the “main business of the Christian life.” He says “Without it, all our professions, gifts and duties signify nothing.”
The Apostle Paul was a good example of one who enjoyed having self-control. As a result, he could be content in any and every circumstance.
I have learned, in whatever situation I am, to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me (Philippians 4:11-13)
So exactly how did Jesus Christ enable him to be joyful in spite of difficult circumstances and trials?
THE BENEFITS OF SELF-CONTROL
Paul had a sense of the incomparable excellence of knowing Christ:
I count everything as loss compared to the all-surpassing excellence of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord (Philippians 3:8)
Since knowing Christ is better than anything else in this world, it is of little consequence if we are deprived of comforts or other temporal blessings as long as we have him.
So this is the first great benefit of self-control: we can be content regardless of our circumstances. The Christian knows that to have the Lord is to have everything and to have everything without the Lord is to have nothing.
The Christian’s highest value is knowing, enjoying and honoring God since God alone is infinitely greater and better than all else combined.
A second benefit of self-control is being able to overcome bad habits and temptations. For many years I worked with people who struggled with addictions.
I saw the best way of overcoming addictions was through faith. Just trying harder will almost never overcome an addiction. The best way was to use the principles of the 12 step program: I can’t do it; God can; I will trust him.
In general, the ones who got free were able to replace their addiction with something better rather than simply trying harder. This replacement principle is what Scottish theologian Thomas Chalmers called “the expulsive power of a new affection.”
He said:
The root power of sin is severed by the power of a superior pleasure — a more compelling joy.
So self-control is better than power because it enables us to resist sinful impulses and forsake sin for the greater good of knowing Christ. We cultivate this grace as we pursue Christ. John Piper daily seeks to see Christ’s supreme goodness from the scriptures so he can be free from the pull of the lesser things. He prays:
Satisfy us in the morning with your steadfast love,
that we may rejoice and be glad all our days (Ps. 90:14)
As we cultivate this fruit of the Spirit, we will be able to be content in any circumstance and overcome the pull of the lesser things that clamor for our hearts.
For those of us who sometimes struggle with self-control, the Savior invites us to simply come to him:
Come to me all you who labor and are heavy laden and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn of me, for I am meek and lowly of hear tand you will find rest for your soul (Matthew 11:28-29).
For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him (John 3:17).
